Persuasion

Chap comes into the shop.

"Hello, I've come to sell these" as he proffers a pile of weekly magazines about the Vietnam war - which build up to make a magnificent collection of the weapons, battles and personalities of the war in 36 weekly parts - beautifully held together in a faux leather binding.

Actually he hadn't bothered with the binding, so it was actually about 30 issues in a genuine plastic bag. (Rare tesco's 1999 edition).

I politely declined on the grounds that I don't buy magazines, and couldn't sell them.

"Go on, they are very good"

"No thank you"

"They are very sought after"

"well if you are such an expert, go and open a f*^*^&g bookshop" (OK so I made that one up - but i did think it)

"You have to take a risk to make money in business, be adventurous"

I pointed out through gritted teeth that buying a pile of rubbish i couldn't sell was not a risk, it was just stupidity, and that for adventure I prefered mountain climbing to buying bags of junk.

"Tell, you what, I'll do you a deal - you take them, and when they sell, give me half the money"

"Nope, I don't sell on commission"

"It's not on commission, i'm giving them to you - just give me half the money when they sell".

I gazed whistfully at the illustrations of AK 47's and daydreamed about the effect of sprinkling napalm over salespeople for a while, then told him to go on his way with his magazines.